Beyond Common Business Secrets

Rise Above: 5 Things to Drop Now to Live Your Best Life

Tracey Watts Cirino Season 3 Episode 76

Are you ready to step into the life you’ve always dreamed of? In this episode, Tracey reveals the 5 things you must give up to create the life you truly want. These aren't just tips—they're the very mindsets, habits, and distractions keeping you from achieving greatness. Let go of what's holding you back, and gain the confidence and clarity to live in alignment with your purpose. Get ready to explore transformational secrets that go beyond common knowledge and into the heart of what it takes to thrive in life and business today!

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  • Hello! Hello! Welcome to beyond common business secrets. I'm your host, Tracey Watts Cirino.
  • and
  • it's so important for anyone who is looking to live their best life.
  • or who's looking to grow in both their professional and personal lives. It's so important for us to not only look at
  • what we can add, but also what we can remove. So today we are diving deep into the 5 things you must give up to create your best life.
  • And this is all about rising above right
  • when you they, these 5 things to drop right now are going to allow you the space to invite in
  • all the things you really want for what's gonna feel to you like your absolute best life.
  • So
  • if I want you to think about this in this term like these are not just behaviors. These are often mental and emotional roadblocks, that if you're anything like me, they just keep us stuck, and we are going to dive in, to rising above.
  • so that you know the 5 things to drop now to live your absolute, best life.
  • And there are many, I would say common misconceptions that when it comes to success I
  • I'm not trying to speak for everyone, but I'm definitely saying this for myself, like I know this was so true for me.
  • and
  • I I would say a hundred percent of the clients that I've worked with.
  • One of the misconception is is that it's only that we have to like. Keep adding things like when we're 1st starting out on our journey of wanting to be successful. We tend to keep adding stuff like, what's the success strategy? What's the tool?
  • What's what's the habit I need to develop? There's always some type of thing like that you know I need to do. I need to add right? So I want you to think about that. If you've been doing it that way, ask yourself.
  • You know. What are these things? I've been telling myself that I have to add right. And then.
  • when we look at this through the lens of it being a common misconception, we forget that some of the most beautiful masterpieces.
  • some of the most beautiful creations, have all been about
  • like curating, like getting rid of what we don't need. Right? Like, I will any day of the week buy a specific program. That is, gonna teach me something specific
  • rather than spending hours upon hours going down a rabbit hole on on Youtube right? Because I know I'm gonna have to sift through thousands of hours of content that is not going to give me the specific thing I need.
  • Now, this is why it's worth paying for other people's knowledge, because it saves you the time, money and energy of doing this. So this is that same thing like, we often think it's just like we have to add more things. But I want to emphasize that
  • when we let go. This is just as crucial to our growth, like we have to let go of things like sometimes.
  • It's things that you never even saw coming like one of the things I have been saying for years is that if you really want to get to know yourself, and you want to grow faster.
  • start a business it is, gonna reveal all your weaknesses. It is going to make you uncomfortable. It is gonna piss you off. It is. Gonna be hard, it is. Gonna feel like you're getting gut punched, and you still have to smile. And you still have to
  • be kind to others like right? So the thing is is that
  • starting a business of any kind is really gonna reveal more of who you are. And if you are on a journey to personal growth and development of any time
  • of any kind at any time. That is a true indicator like it's gonna help you collapse time and get there quicker.
  • So
  • One of one of the things I would say that I had to give up in in my personal life and in in to start like when it really started growing my business.
  • the the most important thing that I have given up, and I've had to do it again and again
  • is, I've had to give up toxic friendships.
  • even though I love and care about. You know certain people.
  • I just could not have them in my life anymore, because
  • they're they're like doubt and tack, like toxicity was making me less effective on following my own dreams and living my best life, and it was hard, and it was gut wrenching, and I cried, and it's like, you know you. You have to separate from that. But there's always, you know there, there's always
  • truth and purity on the other side of that. So know that you are amongst friends, and this is all part of the journey, like, you know, some of it's healing as we grow.
  • So.
  • Why, giving up is a key. Part of growth is that
  • is, that when we
  • give things up, it actually allows space to energetically
  • invite in the things that we really want. So it
  • just using my story as an example, like, if I really want to take my business to the next level and surround myself with with clients and and
  • and create and create things that are more in alignment with, like my views of the world, where I believe that all things are possible, and I believe we can go beyond what
  • we're currently doing, no matter who we are like, right? It's like we can always go beyond. The only thing limiting us is our view of it right now. Now I could not hear my own voice when I was surrounded by toxic friendships.
  • so
  • my voice got diluted when I removed those relationships from my life, though it was tough, and there was lots of tears, and it's like mourning, like the loss of the dead, right? Because it's not that you don't love people, but that was a very tough one. But I just always say, if I can do that like you could do it, my friend, you can do anything, because these things are are tough, so I don't want to sugarcoat that
  • that it's not without its own work. But the 5 things you must give up to create your best life. That's what we're gonna run through today. And so
  • I put these in the order of what I thought was most important. But share with us like reached out on social. Let us know if you would add something, or if you for your list of 5, because maybe get out a notebook and a piece of paper right now, I mean, if you're driving, then maybe wait till you're at.
  • Take your out of Rabbi and put in your notes right? But the thing is is like, write down what you think the top 5 things, because there might be something that comes to your mind like, what are the top things that 5 things that you
  • might intuitively know, that you need to give up right now in this moment
  • to really create your best life. So number one is, you must give up all excuses. That is like all excuses. So you must give up all excuses. Anything that gets in your way. So you must give up all excuses about your ability about
  • your lack, or you know any rational like. You're just kind of excuses, excuses, and and I mean this with love. But anything like it could be like, oh, it's not the right time, the economy, the politics, the blah blah blah! Give up all excuses. We are accepting none of them.
  • 0 0 not accepted. So that may be harsh. But I'm telling you, my friend.
  • if you feel an excuse coming, it's like, Go do that thing anyway, like Oh, I have to wait to call at this. Do it now because you thought of it right. Give up all excuses
  • the moment in my life that I decided to give up all excuses, that is, when everything started changing for the better.
  • And I really really got some confidence in like, wow! You can really design your own life. You don't have to just take the leftover, scraps the trash, the crumbs
  • that people just like tossed you to the side. You can create your best life.
  • So give up all excuses. Number 2 is criticism and negative self talk. So give all of this up. Would you say that to your best friend? So if there's something that you're saying to yourself on on auto. You might not even know it
  • on for years and years, and everybody that's ever worked with me for me, or had me as part of their team.
  • They know this, and I'm sharing this with you. I will say to you over and over again.
  • you're not allowed to talk about my friend that way.
  • So when I catch you saying a negative thing like, Oh.
  • why did I do that like I'm a jerk, or I'm an a-hole, or whatever we call ourselves all sorts of horrible names, things we would never say to a friend.
  • It took me so long to remove all of that trash, and even though I've done so much work to get rid of it
  • like it'll it can still come up if like something is super defeating. But it's really great to be surrounded by people that
  • hold you accountable, and we'll catch you. So you want to give up all of that negative criticism and self talk. So
  • you
  • really, really, really want to look at this sort of real estate in your mind like this is prime $1,000,000,000,000,000 real estate up here.
  • trillion dollar, whatever whatever you want to think about. But this
  • right here, your mind. This is prime real estate. You only want to put in what's good. So when you know, when I was stuck in a loop of negative self-talk and limiting self beliefs, I would say to myself, like, I'm never going to get this, or
  • I just suck at this, or I don't.
  • When I did those things I didn't get anywhere when I changed the story to. You know I'm getting better and and better at this every day. I'm getting strong, like. I remember the 1st time I did yoga. The 1st time I lifted weights. I'm getting stronger and stronger every day. I'm getting stronger and stronger every day in every way.
  • I I am learning what it takes to be really great. At podcasting. I had no clue when we started out. Now we are in the top 5% of all podcasts ever made in history, right, we have over tens of thousands of downloads, and the thing is is that
  • if I kept spinning the spiral of what I didn't know we wouldn't get there. So we are getting better and better every day. We are helping people that need us. We are putting out content that the world needs whatever you need to say to replace the the criticism, negative self talk, or the limiting belief.
  • I'm
  • you just find, like a replacement thing. So this, this is like also people that you trust, that are around you.
  • Letting them know that you're just like on this sort of like taking out the trash, I always call it. Take out the mind trash. So we're taking out the trash right?
  • Because that those thoughts are trash. You need to take it out. It's like pulling the weeds. So you may have people around you that you trust to
  • Bring more awareness to this until you're aware of it yourself.
  • If you do not have people around you. Then this is a really great thing to work with a business coach or a life coach. Get yourself in a mastermind group. Be really conscious of what stuff you're putting in, like, you know, be a part of a supportive
  • community or program audio book, something that's going to put positive thoughts in to replace that.
  • So that is really important, because the minute that we start that we change these limiting beliefs, that is, when true breakthroughs happen right?
  • And that's how we get an alignment.
  • So that one is is so important. And and what happens often, I'm just gonna like this is sort of the the precurs, the precursor to what could come. So what happens often is that you'll you'll notice other people that are really negative and really criticizing you, and you'll want to like
  • pick at it because you're trying so hard not to be.
  • I'm telling you, friend, is somebody that did that for years. Save yourself the the energy and the tears.
  • do not pick at that.
  • Just set a better example right. Set a better example, and if you can't handle their criticism and their negativity, then
  • can continue to limit your time with them. My family members and friends that
  • have this as a tendency. Know that I'm not the person to call to bitch, to, to complain, to.
  • to do that I am. I'm the person that like. Let's talk about growth. Let's talk about what is possible. Like I I'm not the friend to call. If you if you're gossiping about other people, it's just not for me.
  • So
  • I'd rather have less friends
  • because the friends I do have know that we're talking about powerful things that help change the world, not trashing somebody. So just think about like, what do you want to be known for? Right like is.
  • I realized a long time ago like, I don't need to be friends with everyone.
  • because I don't need to be on the loop with all of that right.
  • People know what to come to me for, and that is for what is possible. You want to create a system and strategy that isn't currently there. Right now, I am the spark to help you create something from nothing, and that is my zone of genius. So I help my friends, my family, my clients, by going all in on that.
  • So really think about when you're rising above. And this is like Number 3 on the things that you need to drop now, so that you can live your best life really think through, like all of that, because that is really like wild when it comes to those limiting beliefs and stuff. I'm sorry. That was Number 2. We're we're moving on to Number 3.
  • So number 3 is waiting until you feel like it.
  • Yes, stop waiting till you feel like it.
  • I'm telling you, my friend, you're not going to feel like it every day. In fact, you may never even want to. But
  • if you just do your very best that you can for that day, and you do it. Anyway.
  • it gets better and better. I'm gonna use this as an example. I think it was like some 7 10. I don't know. 7 or 10 years ago, some somewhere in that timeframe. Yeah, I'm not good with time. I think everybody knows that that knows that listens here like I'm really good with money math, but not time zone math.
  • So so here's the thing. The time thing. It was some sometime in the last 10 years is when I really got really clear on
  • having a morning routine like where I had time with my own thoughts, time to think, and I had been waiting and waiting for years like 20 years for to like it, to want to get like, why were these people that wanted to get up and work out, and they were excited about it. I was waiting for like that magical moment that I was gonna want to like. I would feel like it.
  • and it never came. So I decided that I was going to start getting up every morning.
  • even when I didn't feel like it.
  • And I'm telling you that it's been like I said, about 10 years now, and I have a very strong morning routine, and I don't know if I ever like getting up. Not one day ever. But I like how I feel when it's done. I like doing my meditation, my workout walking with my husband. I love putting the things that matter to me
  • to me.
  • then things that matter to me. I love putting them first.st So what could you do
  • first? st That matters most to you. That's the way you look at this. So
  • so you cannot wait.
  • You can just do it a little bit every day.
  • And and oftentimes the underlying, the sort of the underlying thing of this, of how we're waiting is like fear of failure like we're actually really afraid. So that's what's holding us back to take action. We're like waiting till we feel confident, or or feel like we really know it, or we could do it perfect, or whatever. So you want to just
  • completely give that up like, remove that.
  • The the thing is is that you almost have to accept that you are going to fail along the way, and just like find a way to laugh
  • at yourself through the process. Right? You can be really serious about the work and the goals that you're doing, but find a way to laugh about it.
  • to not take yourself so seriously. That that's the thing, because if we are afraid of
  • that like if we're afraid of failing, or we're waiting and waiting till we feel like it, we'll never take action, and then that is just going to be the new learned behavior, which is more negativity, more self doubt, even more shame. So
  • the thing is is that when we decide you know what I'm I don't feel like it like sometimes. That's just these. I don't feel like it. I may never feel like it, but I want this bad enough. Then I'm gonna do it. And and you set a goal. Maybe it's I'm gonna do this goal every day for 10 days.
  • Okay, you did 10 days. How do you feel? Okay? Great. I'm gonna do this every day for 30 days. Okay? Great. Do you see what I'm saying? So you don't have to feel like it. And there's gonna be days in there that aren't your absolute best day. But you did it anyway, and you did the best you could given what was happening that day. That's all we can ask for from you, that's all you can ask of yourself.
  • Honor, celebrate that within yourself, because that is truly amazing, my friend, and that is a gift that continues to give.
  • It's a gift that keeps on giving. It's your gift to the world. And that is just more and more giving. And it kind of helps. You attract all the right clients and
  • opportunities and all the things by just doing that. So number 4 on our list is you need to like completely give up
  • energy vampires, and what I call the fun and soul sucking a-holes of the world. Okay, so you need to give them up.
  • Just give them up.
  • I
  • I know. But you almost have. It's harsh, but it's funny. So you, these are things that make you laugh like. It's not their fault. They're doing the best they can with where they're at right now. But you've got to protect you being your number one asset, and you've got to get out of space and energy with them.
  • So anytime these it doesn't matter. It could be your family, it could be your your team, it could be you, your friend, like old friends you've had forever that are part of your friend Circle, I'm telling you, if they fit any of these
  • these like characteristics where they're energy vampires, they're they suck the fun and soul out of everything, and they absolutely just act like a-holes like you're embarrassed to them because of how they treat the server like like you like are like, oh, I'm trying not to judge or be. I'm trying not to judge anybody or give criticism. But I'm shrinking because I cannot believe how you just treated that person
  • that's not somebody to be around, or if it, you feel exhausted after you're with them, right like these are energy vampires again, not their fault. Just not for you cut cut it.
  • These are toxic relationships or toxic environments. So just start exploring how your relationships feel both in your personal and professional life.
  • because these have a huge impact on influencing your growth. Here's an example. If you go to a friend
  • that you're expecting to be supportive. And you're like, hey? I'm gonna do this new thing. I'm starting this new business. I'm so excited they
  • have maybe don't know that they should just be supportive because you're in the early stages, and they're they're afraid for you. So they're gonna be like, oh, my God! What if this happens? Oh, my God! What if this happens. What if the you're gonna end up in a ditch and homeland? And
  • now that great idea you had!
  • You don't even it does. It doesn't take off. It never gets birthed, because one person who was just sharing their own fears because they love you, and they want to protect you, which is, bless them. We love that they want to protect you.
  • You didn't even get it off the ground. You didn't give it a chance. So be careful. In the beginning of starting anything new, who you surround yourself with? There are people that I love that are just this way, and I have learned now 1st I had to go when I completely cut out. Cut that out because it wasn't good for me.
  • But over time, when you get stronger and you really know how to protect your energy and your environment.
  • You can limit the time that you spend with loved ones, that even if they're that way, because you know what you have to do
  • to be ready to be in their energy. So this is the thing you don't. You just have to understand that you are only going to be at your best when you are surrounded by what's best for you. So just start exploring these
  • relationships and and maybe look how they're influencing you. So the importance of boundaries and protecting your energy is that you know they
  • they think that they're protecting you, but they're just sharing their own fears. And that is how our human brain works like it protects us from the, you know, tigers when we were cave people. But the thing is now is that that same brain is protecting you from something that like doesn't need protecting like. So what if nobody understands what you're doing? How do you think innovation happens. So
  • think about surrounding yourself with people that have done what you wanted. So when I 1st I mean, I've known forever my whole life that I want to write a book. But when I actually realized I could give myself permission to actually explore it, I had to reach out and make new friends, because I realized in my circle I didn't really know any
  • authors at the time, and I was like, oh, I knew 2 of them. So in my circle I reached out to 2 people that were already authors.
  • and ask them if I could, you know, have a conversation.
  • and that is how I started surrounding myself with people that had what I wanted. When I was starting my 1st salon company, I started by being part of something at the time was called the Professional Salon Association. It doesn't exist anymore because they've changed it so many times. But
  • the Salon Association was amazing, because it allowed me to be surrounded by higher level, super successful salon owners. When I got into the coaching and consulting industry I became certified in John Fee Maxwell, who's the number one leadership coach?
  • I became certified in the Success Principles training. Who? Which is jack Canfield, who is like the number one, self esteem and success trainer. So I'm certified in that. And Tony Robbins, I did business, mastery. So when
  • I choose to change course of anything, I will surround myself with the people that are doing it right. That is how you level up. So you don't have to just give things up and not and think like, oh, I'm gonna have no friends. It's you have to just put yourself in new environments where you can thrive. So this is true, like, if you are a photographer. If you own a boutique.
  • get yourself in front of who the best people are right, or you can get yourself in a group of highly performing female business owners from all different types of industries. Because then you guys can refer each other and collaborate. And it's like tons of fun that way. But get yourself in a high Vibe situation. So get rid of the toxic relationships and toxic environments. And number 5. This is.
  • you need to give up approval.
  • You need to give up approval. So not everyone is going to like your idea.
  • or even like, or even gonna like you like some. It took me a long time to realize, but sometimes just by me walking in a room. I trigger people not to like me. Okay, I cannot chase them around people pleasing and needing validation from them. When I have these other 10 people that
  • align and really want what I have to offer right cause. Then I would just spend all my time
  • feeling bad about myself, and I would have limiting beliefs and lots of negative self talk. So the thing is is that you want to
  • completely remove approval from anyone other than yourself. To be honest. The thing is is that when you are
  • feel right and in alignment with your soul's integrity.
  • the integrity of your soul. What you were put here to do for this little precious time that we have on earth. You will no longer need
  • or be waiting for approval from anyone else. So it's so important to just toss it away. That's a bunch of trash. We don't need it.
  • And the other. The other thing is that this, the underlying thing here, is that
  • this creates sometimes this constant need for constant validation. So
  • we need to remove the outside validation because this actually stipends your authenticity, your creativity, and anything
  • creative and visionary that you would bring to the world. So you want to cultivate self confidence and trust in your own intuition, and you can only do this by getting away from the noise. And instead of saying, Well, what do you think I should do right in the journal?
  • What what do you think I should do to yourself, to your soul, to your intuition, to God, to the higher power, to every spirit, guide to the energetic vibration of the earth. Whatever you believe, whatever in alignment for your truest and best, greatest self.
  • this true soul alignment. That's who you ask, not
  • not in our human form, outside of us. Right? Those are the questions you ask. These are things you meditate about. These are things you journal about. I know that for the longest time this this goes back to when I was dating. Lots of people.
  • I always tease my husband, Anthony, about this, but this this is like how I knew when, before I met him.
  • I had dated a lot of different people, and I would be like, oh, I like this about him, and I like that about him. And oh, he's great over here.
  • and I would tease and say, Oh, I wish I could put
  • them in a blender! Then I'd have like the perfect guy, and like oh, well, what do you think of him? Is what I would ask. My friends and my family.
  • and
  • everyone had their different opinions, but
  • I was just like
  • kind of putting off the inevitable.
  • My heart's intuition knew that wasn't the right person for me, like when I was not able to be myself because of the way that that
  • person I was dating was that that wasn't for me. So this is true for business. This is true for friendships. This is true for relationships. This is true for romantic. This is how you know. When I met my husband I never asked one person
  • what they thought of him right. I didn't need to, because I knew that he was the right person for me, and we became really great friends for a long time, and then eventually got married.
  • But the thing is is that
  • when I tell my kid that story
  • they laugh because they're like, Mom, you had a lot of boyfriends. I'm like, yeah, I had to see what was out there. I had to kind of figure things out, and the more that you realize that you don't need anyone else's validation. That is how you can truly step into really, really releasing other people's
  • limiting
  • limiting beliefs, stories about yourself that that you know you may maybe have been playing on a loop since you were a little kid.
  • So the thing is is that these are the 5 things that you need to completely. Oh, erase right, we need to, just like must give them up. Get rid of them. We're taking off the trust. You must drop them now
  • to live your best life.
  • the
  • our best life, and the life you truly desire and dream and know is possible for yourself is on the other side of these 5 things that are holding you back. So I hope that you found this very helpful. I hope you enjoy the funny little stories and lessons, and
  • I would really love to know
  • if you decide to have this be a topic that you talk to your team about. Have this be a topic that you talk to your clients about. This is a way to really help. You know people dig deeper. So I encourage you to really take inventory of where one of these 5 things could be holding you back.
  • and where you want to start beginning the process of releasing. So that is going to help you so much, and it will catapult your success forward by removing those things.
  • It it's like curating right? I always think of like you know it when when vogue magazine comes out with their perfect cover. You know they had a storyboard. They had all this stuff lots of ideas when it starts out.
  • but if it was released with all that, we we'd be confused like what?
  • But it's always like strong. It's powerful whether you like it or not. It invokes an emotion.
  • That's what you want. Like it. That's how you want it to feel right. You get rid of all the stuff that isn't working and leave the essence of who you really are. That is how you tap into living and creating your absolute, best life. So, my friend, I cannot wait to hear in the, in the comments.
  • Please share with us what inventory you took, what you realize that you have been allowing to block you in your life and and what things you're gonna get rid of. I'd love to know those things, and I invite you if you want to dive even deeper into this type of work.
  • Schedule to have a discovery call with me. I would love to dive into helping you set up the systems and strategies that help protect you from all of this. And if you would like even more time saving
  • tips and strategies, I encourage you to download. If you have not done that yet to download our 5 time saving strategies. Guide it is beyond commoncoaching.com forward slash strategies.
  • and
  • I will put in the show notes, of course.
  • And if you got value from this episode, I encourage you to subscribe to this podcast and share it with your business bestie.
  • And as always.
  • we appreciate you and congratulate you for spending your time so wisely this week and tuning in to beyond common business secrets. We would love if you could give us a 5 star review wherever you are tuning into this podcast. And as always stay amazing. And I will see you on the next one.
  • Take care you're already beyond amazing. Take care.